Dealing with something new is never easy, especially when you have come time find that you are dying. I was recently reading an article that really explained how to cope when you don't know what to do next. "Coping With Chronic Illnesses" really explained the best ways to cope and accept the challenges you are facing.

What did you do?

This is an interview that I did with an Aplastic Anemia patient that was diagnosed ten years ago. He has been in remission for 9 years and recently had another seizure. He is now struggling with another part of his illness.

1.What were your feelings when you first got sick?
Devastated, I had never been sick with anything worse then the common flu and now I was getting told I had little chance to live. I had no clue what to do and just wanted to give up.

2.What were your coping mechanisms?

Telling jokes, making others laugh and just trying to act as if nothing had happened and this whole hospital stay was a hotel stay I did what I wanted to do and nothing else.


3.Why did you decide to cope the way that you did?
No, other choice. its like the song, "live like you were dying" I had nothing to lose so I'm going to make the best out of the time I had.


4.How were the nurses and doctors as well as the friends and family around you an an effect on how you coped?
Some of the doctors didn't understand a common rule, people want to know the truth. If there was one thing that helped me more than anything, it was being told exactly what was going on because I could face it head on. Parents, I think can never help with coping. You can see the pain and worry in their eyes and it hurts a lot more to see that someone else is in pain for you than you are for yourself.


5.How did tyhe poeple around you cope?
People, tried to skirt the issue and not talk about it. And when it comes to me doing anything at all they consider me to be this china doll ready to break at the slightest touch.

What's the next step?

After being diagnosed, what do you do next? Well, some people may slip into a depression, others may ignore it, and the last classification is that people may live it up. For me, coping became easier when I had people to talk to. I found a group of people that were going through the same things I was and just spending time with them. So, the next step is to find a group of people that will help you get through the same things that they have been through and will be going through.

The way one may cope is not always the same as the next person. Many people say that the next step is to talk to someone or address the fact that there is going to be something that you will have to face in your life. I say the next step is to cope the best way in which you are capable of.

coping mechanisms.

You can only spend so much time in the hospital without meeting a plethora of people. Well that is exactly what happened to me. After spending about a month in the hospital, I met many people, some of which i have become very close to. It is so easy to make these friends because we all have one thing in common! Seeing as we have one thing in common, we have spent a multitude of time in the hospital, there was one specific thing that we would be definitely talking about. That one thing is the way in which we have coped with the difficult times in our lives. Some people said that they coped by hiding or denying the fact that there was anything wrong with them, while the others took it on head first. This seems to be the most effective way, because those who took their ailment on head first definitely had a more positive attitude and were all around happier people. Although that is what I saw in many people, every person is different.

Is the grass always greener on the other side?

It started when I was nine and has continued for nine years. It is something that I will have to endure for the rest of my life. November 2, 2001 was the day that my life changed FOREVER! I was admitted to the hospital and shortly there after diagnosed with something known as Lupus. I did not know what was happening to me or even what was next. The next few years were the most terrifying and difficult times I would ever endure.

Most of the time, a nine year old girl would be spending her days at school and her weekends going to birthday parties and spending "fun time with her family. Well for me, that was not the case. For a month, when I was nine, I spent every day and night in the hospital. It then proceeded to monthly Chemotherapy treatments, days at a time in the hospital and the rest of the time at home. I missed more than half of my fourth grade year, and the second half, I could only attend half days, if that. It finally went into Chemo treatments every three months, but this continued all the way through 6th grade. So, was my life easy? No not necessarily, but that is only because of the way in which I coped.

The choice was always up to me. I had the decision weather I was going to hide from the awful truth or if I was going to make the best of my situation. At first, I hid from what seemed to be taking over my life, but i finally realized that it was important that I do not hide. I must take control of the situation, because if I had not, I would not ever lead a happy life.

"Life is a journey, not a destination, there are no mistakes, just chances we’ve taken lay down your regrets cause all we have is now" -A Beautiful Day : India.Arie

Living with a possible fatal disease, such as Cancer, Lupus, or Aplastic Anemia, can be one of the hardest things anyone will ever have to do. But the choice is up to you. How do people cope with these daily, life long issues. Do they let the "monster defeat" them or with the win their lives over and survive the battle for their lives?